Nonviolent Communication (NVC) is a powerful and respectful way of connecting with oneself and others, especially in negotiation settings.
Marlies and Sytse Tjallingii are experienced in NVC and NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming). Together, they have run many courses on communication skills in the Netherlands, Palestine and Israel, Croatia and Serbia, Canada, and Gabon.
During the workshop, they will explain how communication works in our brains, using an NLP communication model and the different steps of NVC, illustrated through the metaphors of the giraffe and the jackal.
1) Focus on observation: Before reacting impulsively, take a moment to observe the situation or behaviour that triggers a response within you. Avoid jumping to conclusions or making judgments. Instead, objectively describe the situation without assigning blame or negativity.
2) Acknowledge your feelings: Identify and express your emotions honestly, without resorting to blaming or criticising others. Use “I” statements to describe your feelings in a clear and non-confrontational manner.
3) Uncover your needs: Explore the underlying needs that fuel your emotions. These needs are often universal, such as connection, respect, autonomy, and security. Recognising these needs will help you understand the root cause of your feelings and communicate them effectively.
4) Express your needs clearly: Communicate your needs to others using clear and direct “I” statements. Focus on mutual understanding and avoid making demands or ultimatums.
5) Find as many options as possible: There may be more than one way to fulfil your needs. The more options you can think of, the more flexibility you will have in finding solutions.
6) Practice active listening: Engage in active listening by giving others the space to express their feelings and needs without interruption. Show genuine interest and empathy by reflecting back what you hear and asking clarifying questions. This will help you understand their perspective and foster a deeper connection.
By incorporating these NVC principles into our daily interactions, we can cultivate empathy, build stronger relationships and navigate conflicts with greater understanding and respect.
